Don’t Blink

It was someone's house, I don't know exactly where, but somewhere. 

It was around this time.. maybe this year maybe a few years from now.

I was there with my family. 

My parents and sisters were off to the side. 

All of my family as well as my childhood friend Elissa.  I looked over and saw Elissa talking to someone.  I wasn't sure who it was but then I saw it.

It was the most beautiful lady ever. 

It was Tammy. 

Tammy was alive and was back and healthy. She was the age she would've been this year; 53-54 maybe.  She was so beautiful. 

So healthy. So alive. 

I couldn't get up the courage to say anything.  I was too scared to talk to her. So I hid off to the side.  Finally, I went.

I spoke and started talking. The way she listened was as if I were a stranger to her. Maybe she didn't recognize me.  It has been 11 years since she's been gone. 

She looked so confused, if she were supposed to know me. Then, I asked her if she knew who I was. She thought about it for a second and made a guess. 

She spoke and  said "Jessie right?" 

I said "no... Tammy,

it's Kayci...your goddaughter..."

At that moment, her facial expression changed completely. 

She opened up. 

She smiled 

She said my name with so much love. 

She grabbed me and hugged me so tight, as if she had missed me so much the way I missed her. I saw tears in her eyes.

Which was okay, because I was already balling by this time.

I didn't know how to react.  

All I kept thinking was…

She's back. 

My godmother.  My second mom. 

My favorite, most beautiful lady is back. She's alive and she's healthy. 

I didn't know how it happened but it did. 

I walked away, took a breath, and blinked.

She was gone.